Witty Stories from Islamic History

[SkyAboveYou]

As Salamu Alaikum...

Thought of starting a thread for 'witty stories' from books of history...
If you have a story then add it...:)


The Intelligent Questioner

It is said that a beggar went to a rich man from Khurasan and asked for help. He heard him say to his servant, "O Gold, say to Gem, to say to Jewel, to say to Sapphire, to say to this beggar that we do not have anything." The beggar raised his hands to the sky and said, "O my Lord, say to Jibril, to say to Israfil, to say to Mikail, to say to `Izrail to take the soul of this miser."

[SkyAboveYou]

He Made the Ruler Laugh

Asma`i relates from his father that a prisoner was brought before `Abdul-Malik and was accused of having rebelled against the ruler. `Abdul-Malik said, "Strike his neck." The prisoner said, "O Leader of the Believers, this should not be the reward that I receive from you. By Allah, I did not join the ranks of such and such person except because I cared about you and was looking out for your best interests. I am an unlucky man, and I have never fought side by side with a man, except that we were defeated. Throughout the years, I have been better for you than 1000 people on your side who cared about you. I was with such and such person and we were defeated, and then I was with such and such person and we were defeated…" He went on mentioning the people that were defeated by `Abdul-Malik. `Abdul-Malik laughed upon hearing this and freed the man.

[Dar Alsalam]

Ali bin Abi Taleb ( The cousin of the prophet and the caliph ) found a shield
(weapon) of his with a jew . The jew picked it up when it dropped from Ali's
camel. Ali Recognised the shield. Ali said " This is my shield dropped from my
camel " . The jew said " The shield is mine and it is in my hand, we can go to
the judge of the muslims to solve the dispute ".



They came to judge Shareeh,when he saw Ali " The Chief of the believers**" the judge moved a side and Ali sat there . Shareeh said "What is it the Chief of the believers?"

Ali said"This is my shield dropped from my camel and this jew picked it up"

Shareeh said "What do you say jew" The jew said "The shield is mine and in my hand"

Shareeh said to Ali " you told the truth Chief of the belivers but you must
bring two witnesses, so Ali called on gumbar (his freed slave) and his son Hassan and they testified that the shield is Ali's.

Shareeh said "As for your freed slave, we accept his testimony, but we don't accept the testimony of your son!"

Ali said "May your mother lose you !* didn't you hear Omar ibn Alkhatab quoting the prophet "Hassan and Hussain are at the head of the youth in paradise " ??

Shareeh said " By God,yes "
Ali said "Don't you accept the testimony of the head of the youth in paradise"?!

Ali said to the jew "Take the shield"


The jew said " The Chief of the believers came with me to the judge of the
muslims and he ruled for me !! and he (Ali) accepted!

By God you told the truth (Ali) the Chief of the believers , it is your shield
dropped from your camel and I picked it up . I bear witness that there is no god exept Allah and Mohammed is his messenger"


Then Ali gave him the shield and rewarded him with 900 ( coins), and he was
killed latter in battle with Ali on battle of Seffin.

Narrated by Abo Noaim in Alhilya.



* The arabs curse at a person and not necessarily mean harm to him

***The title of the head of Islamic state at that time was chief of the
believers

[Dar Alsalam]

Once the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) told his companions the story of three of the Children of Israel - a leper, a bald man and a blind man. To test the gratitude of these three poor men. Allah sent an angel to each of them.

To the leper, the angel said, "Of all things, which would you most love to have?" The leper replied, "A beautiful complexion, beautiful skin and a cure for the ailment for which people shun me." So the angel passed his hands over the man, and his wishes were granted. The angle again asked, "Of all things, what would you most love to possess?" "Camels," he replied. So he was given a pregnant she-camel. As the angel left, he said, "May Allah bless it."

To the man with the bald head, the angel said, "Of all things, what would you most love to have?" The man replied, "Beautiful hair and a cure for this baldness for which people shun me." So the angel passed his hands over him and his wishes were granted. Again the angel asked, "Of all things, what would you most love to possess?" "Cows," he replied. So he was given a pregnant cow. And the angel said, "May Allah bless it."

To the blind man, the angel said, "of all things, what would you most love to have?" He replied, "My sight restored by Allah, so that I can see people." So the angels passed his hands over him, and he regained his sight. Then the angel said, "Of all things, what would you most love to possess?" "Sheep," he replied. So he was given a ewe with its lambs. And the angel said, "May Allah bless them."

All the animals multiplied, so that the first man had a valley full of camels, the second a valley full of cows and the third a valley full of sheep.

Later, the angel came to the first man and said, "I am a poor man, unable to travel any further without Allah's help -or yours. By the One Who has given you wealth and a beautiful skin and complexion, give me a camel to ride on my journey."

The man replied, "I have too many obligations and I cannot give you one." The angel said, "I seem to recognize you. Weren't you once a leper whom people shunned? And weren't you poor before Allah gave you so much?" The man replied, "I inherited this wealth from a nobleman, who inherited it from a nobleman." The angel said, "If you are a liar, may Allah turn you back into a leper."

Then, he came to the man who once had a diseased scalp and made the same request as he had to the first man. His plea was similarly turned down. The angel said, "If you are a liar, may Allah turn you back into a bald man."

Coming to the third man, he said, "I am a poor, homeless man, unable to reach my destination, unless Allah, or you, can help me. By the One who restored your sight, give me a ewe to help me on my way." The man said, "I was blind, and Allah restored my sight. So take whatever you will and leave whatever you will, for, by Allah, I will not grudge you anything you take for His sake." The angel said, "Keep your wealth, for you were only being tested. You may keep your blessings, but your companions have lost all."

The moral of this story:

We should always be grateful for the blessings Allah bestows on us, and ready to help others.

(This story is based on the Hadith of Sahih Muslim No. 2964 and Sahih Bukhari No. 3464. from: Goodword Islamic studies]



Ref:
http://islamweb.net/pls/iweb/misc1.view_topic?vtopic=14236&thelang=E

[Dar Alsalam]

A man came to the leader of the believers Omar Bin Abdulaziz (rahimho Allah). He was accompnied by his elderly mother.

The Calif asked the man how he was treating his mother. The man said " I have done everything in my power to help her and please her. "

The Calif asked " Does she has a husband ?"
The man astonished at the question and said somthing like " She is not fit for marriage"

The mother said " Shut up , Do you know better or the Calif ? "

[Dar Alsalam]

A prince and his companion met a beautiful women.

The prince said to his companion " I like this women , I want to marry her !"

The companion said " I don't advise you of this"

The prince said " Why?"

The companion said " I saw a man kissing her !! "


A few weeks later the companion married that beutifull women. The prince surprised asked him " Did'nt you tell me you saw a man kissing her ?

The companion said " Yes, that turned out to be her father ! "